Karate Talk

Armchair Senseis

The term "armchair quarterback" is well-known in the United States, and possibly outside of it. The term refers to fans of American football, the type who sit in their armchairs watching the games on Sunday afternoon, yelling instructions at the TV screen and berating the quarterback for being stupid, being slow, not aiming a pass right, or making poor decisions. Most of the people in these armchairs have never played football themselves (at least, not since they left Kiddie League at age 9), and are certainly not in any shape to try it. However, they are the self-acknowledged masters of the game.

Armchair quarterbacks exist in many areas of life, including karate. We have an armchair sensei that "teaches" some of our dojo members in a similar fashion. He is, I believe, a Shodan, but I'm not sure because he hasn't actually trained since before I started -- so it's been at least 8 years, and I think it's more like 10. During my entire training time, he has attended exactly 3 classes, spread out over a month, at which point he again dropped out because "it's just too hard on my knees".

This doesn't stop him from "teaching" other people though. Several of his co-workers train in our dojo, and work with the armchair sensei (AS) once a week or so. He waxes eloquent on karate, philosophy, form, training, and technique. He regards himself as a martial arts expert, and frequently includes "and I have a black belt in karate" when meeting new people. His followers feel that he is very wise, helps them so much, and they come in excited to work hard, convinced that they've made great improvements in their karate. He also tells them what the failings and weaknesses of the other dojo members are, including me, so his disciples also come in smugly sure that they're doing things better than the higher ranking black belts. Certain of his habits can be seen in those who regard him as their personal, out-of-dojo sensei, which is not always a good thing, since karate habits can be both good and bad.

The big problem here for me is that, by my reckoning, it's been at least a year and a half since he has seen me do karate. Although I'm willing to say that he might be able to watch me and see things that could be improved, that's hard to do if you aren't actually watching someone. The last words of wisdom that he said about my karate weaknesses were said just yesterday -- along with the comment that if he could just get his hands on my hips, he could show me exactly what I'm doing wrong. My immediate response to that is that if those hands come anywhere near my hips, he's going to lose one of them. The point could also be made that he ought to at least see what my karate looks like now, before presuming to tell people that I'm doing it "wrong".

He has also made comments about our dai sempai, a Sandan with 18 years in the dojo and a member of the regional team; another Sandan who is one of our most consistent and supportive dojo members, with at least 15 years of training who is a very powerful karate-ka despite back and knee problems, worthy of respect by any standards; and our Sensei, a Rokudan who's been at this for well over 30 years and is widely respected by his peers.

The person I blasted in my last post with "trains" with this AS, and holds him in very high respect. He quotes him as though he was an authority, word for word. When our Sensei's instruction does not agree with the AS, this person will default to the AS. It's highly disrespectful and presumptive. It's also a syndrome that we've seen come and go with several other members of our dojo, so we can only hope it will pass in this one as well.

I think our AS needs to examine his motives for wishing to undermine the established hierarchy of our dojo, an organization that has been nothing but supportive and tolerant of him. I think that his knee problems have very little to do with the fact that he no longer trains in dojo. That may have been the original reason he left, but it has long ceased to be a driving factor. I think that after 10 years of "personal" training, and of setting himself up as a mentor to those who are moving up the karate ranks, he likes being the authority, and has no desire to be the student. Nor does he wish his acolytes to see him, standing below the rest of us in class, having to take correction from Sensei.

He will never actually be able to do the things he claims we all lack, but he can always blame it on his knee. Or his back. And he can continue to tell others what they ought to do, while refusing to take instruction himself. Those who respect him would be well-advised to look at the hard facts: They are allowing a someone who has not trained or received instruction in 10 years to override the teachings of a credentialed and respected Sensei. This Sensei is a man who teaches three times a week and trains every day, who drives an hour at least once a week so that he can train under a higher-rank Master and receive instruction and correction, who is constantly striving to improve himself and who remains humble.

The differences speak for themselves.

Self-Control and Mutual Respect

I'm taking a break from the Master Camp series to write a post which I might well delete later, but needs to be written now to keep myself from exploding in anger. It is, if you will, my test of my own self-mastery.

It is also going to be very disrespectful to one member of my dojo. However, probably not nearly as much as he currently deserves, in my not very humble current opinion.

I've been doing karate for 8 years now. In our dojo, that gives me a respectable karate age. In the karate world, I'm still pretty young, despite the Nidan rank I bear. I'm proud of that rank, not because I think it means I'm all that plus a side of fries, but because I worked my ass end off to get it. It represents training 3 - 6 days a week, EVERY week, for many years now, through injuries and illness and frustrations. It represents dan testing 4 days after a car accident but still passing and being told I had performed well. It represents a hell of a lot of learning, and re-learning, and taking a hell of a lot of advice and instruction and doing my best to translate it into physical reality.

It also represents years spent learning just why mutual respect in the dojo is so important, and learning to deeply appreciate it.

So now, someone who has been training only 4 years, and trains roughly half as often as I do on a routine basis, has been treating me with a subtle contempt. He has made comments, in my hearing, about having to be "careful" around me so he won't hurt me, because he's so much bigger and stronger. He's also a lot slower, so I'm not much worried except that his control still sucks, and I'm sick of getting popped by out of control punches. We were doing a slow-speed, rhythm type of sparring drill in the dojo a couple of months back, and since I outrank him by a full black belt level (and was Nidan before he made his Shodan), I was being careful to tone it down to his speed. He responded by grabbing one of my slow kicks, yanking me off my feet and flipping me to the floor, twisting my knee and my back in the process. I got up so furious I could have spit on him but contented myself with asking him not to do that again.

So what do I hear tonight? He did this on purpose, he brags to a friend of mine. To show me how slow my kicks are. If I'd just use my hips properly, my kicks could be much faster, and then they go higher too.

My kicks can and frequently do go above my head. These kicks snap back a little slower than my stomach-level kicks because, well, they have farther to go. His kicks reach knee level at best, and the only reason they snap back quickly is because he neither raises his knee to his chest, nor does he drive forward with his kicks. He flips his foot out and back, and stands smugly.

He says that he's so much stronger than I am that it's hard for him to spar me because he has to hold back so he won't hurt me, because I'm so slow he's afraid I can't get out of the way.

When I spar him, I am on the verge of falling asleep. He telegraphs every movement, so I casually step aside about halfway through. The few times I've gone full speed on him, he had barely started to move out of my way, so I've had to seriously slow down because crashing into a brick wall of a human is painful.

He also claims I try to get by on my upper body strength. WHAT upper body strength? I believe that the fact that I get full extension on my punches, whereas his fall a good 6" short of the mark because he neither straightens his elbow nor supports with his back, have misled him.

It's a damn good thing we don't train again until Saturday. I just might forget my karate manners, and show this Neolithic bastard just exactly what I'm capable of when I'm not humoring the elderly!!!!!

Master Camp, Part II

A typical day at Master Camp:

Wake up at 6:00AM as "Whistle Bob" walks through the camp, blowing the whistle and yelling at everyone to wake up. I quickly learned that Whistle Bob stays by your cabin until he hears a response, so I joined the others in yelling "Good morning Bob!" so that he'd move on!

First training session is scheduled for 6:30AM. Head down for the tennis courts about 6:20AM, making sure that you beat the Senseis down there! If you don't beat them, you risk being thrown in the swimming pool! Once they arrive, someone leads warmups (these are done outside, in your shoes), and then everyone lines up for the morning run. Those of us who have knee problems or other injuries step off to the side, to the "Wall of Shame", while everyone else takes off. We walk across the field as they run around the camp, all meeting up in the Shoto Dome for the first training. Once inside, another quick stretching session is followed by instruction from one of the Masters (they rotate each day). The first days of camp are really crowded, and there were more than 430 people at one of the meals! That means a very crowded training dome, and having to be very careful. I had to pull all of my kicks and just go through the motions for the first 2 days, until camp thinned out. These were taught during my stay by Masters Koyama, Osaka, Takashina, Mikami and Yaguchi.

Training ends at 8:00AM, and everyone heads back to their cabins to shower and clean up for breakfast at 8:45AM. Everyone takes a turn at waiting tables, 2 meals during your stay. If you're serving, you go over early to get set up and grab a quick meal before the work starts!

8:40AM you head up near the dining hall, starving! At 8:45AM or thereabouts, Whistle Bob comes out and blows the whistle to call you all in to eat. You go and find a seat, but do not sit down until the Senseis come and are seated at the head table. Your waiter(s) will start bringing out the food, which you pass along down the table. Breakfast ends around 9:45AM; no leaving until the Senseis are finished!

Optional training starts at 11:00AM, so there's an hour to kill. Many people take a nap in their cabin, others go swimming in the pool or take walks or make a quick trip into town for supplies (knee braces, Gatorade, etc).

11:00AM Optional training in the Shoto Dome. Although the instructor is subject to change, Sensei Field taught most of the optional trainings this session. This training lasts an hour.

12:45PM Lunch is served, same rules as breakfast.

3:00PM is when the color belt afternoon training takes place, optional training for black belts, and Instructor Training. We Instructor Trainees met in the Shoto Dome and had a 1-1/2 hour training session, a different Master each day. They've made some changes to the katas, so this was our first chance to learn those changes and start to integrate them. Very beneficial, but mentally and physically exhausting. These trainings end at 4:30PM.

4:30PM is the time for afternoon black belt trainings. The black belts are separated into 2 groups, one in the Shoto Dome and one in the Okazaki Dome. I trained over in the Okazaki Dome, doing katas and some sparring combinations. The training was excellent, and it was a little bit less crowded with the group split in half (but still a squeeze at times). The biggest issue was that the domes are open-air, which means that you are at the mercy of the elements. On rainy days, rain can blow in on you. While I was there, it meant training in high heat and humidity with no fans, which was very tiring for me since I'm not used to it. These trainings end at 6:00PM.

Dinner is at 7:00PM and lasts for an hour, same meal rules as above.

There was an optional lecture each evening, by a different Sensei, with different insights. These generally started at 8:00PM and lasted however long the speaker wished.

Lights out time is 10:00PM for those who haven't chosen to go into town for the evening. Whistle Bob makes the rounds again yelling for you to turn out the lights and go to sleep. Exhausted by then, this was never an issue for me!

And besides, I had to get my rest. Another big day tomorrow!

Master Camp, Part I

I'm going to be writing a series of articles on Master Camp for the next few days. Why? Because there's no way to process all that input at once. I need to think "out loud" in this blog to sort my way through it all and organize it. This post will be the "overall summary".

Master Camp was... an experience. Both more and less than I expected. I'd elaborate on that but it really would be impossible to explain it to anyone who hasn't been there. I'm on information overload and it really did recharge my karate batteries as well as giving me a new outlook. It also gave me a whole lot of things to think about, including the fact that they've made a number of changes to a number of kata, some relatively minor but some which will be very difficult to adjust to.

I'd been warned about the food (not nearly as bad as some people said, in fact there was only one meal that I didn't like), the accommodations (see above statement about food), and that you're very tired by the end of the week (understatement of the century). As indicated, none of those things in any way lived up to what I was anticipating. In most cases, that was good!

I was NOT expecting open-air training domes, 88 degrees and 90% humidity. These things are hard on those of us from dry cool climates, although the setting was very beautiful. We were soaked head to foot in sweat just walking to training, and I cannot begin to describe the condition of the gis I brought home. They're soaking in a lot of detergent right now, we'll see if it helps! They need all the help they can get. They worked hard last week, and boy oh brother do they show it.

One thing I know had been mentioned but never really sunk in was the true international nature of the camp. It was really wild and good to train not only with the Canadians (who I'm used to) but also Mexicans, Bolivians, Israelis, a team from Lebanon, people from the Caribbean (Trinidad and Barbados), and even from Nigeria! Master Ueki from Japan pulled a tendon 2 weeks prior to camp and couldn't come, and Master Osaka came instead. It was quite something to train with him, along with the classes I had that were taught by Masters Okazaki, Koyama, Takashina, Mikami, and of course Yaguchi. All of those Masters in one week should explain the "information overload" I'm feeling right now. It was also really wild to have so many high rank people to train with -- as a nidan, I was such a karate baby! I really admire the few color belts that had the guts to show up. I wouldn't have, not at green belt.

The ideas that were presented were both old and new. Some I'd heard before, but understood better this time. Others, primarily from Masters Mikami and Osaka who I have never trained with before, were new and different and exciting (and sometimes annoying!). They will give me much to consider and try out in the weeks and months to come.

The people in general were awesome, but I must say I think the men overall had better spirit than the women. There were more than a few of the women who indulged themselves in a lot of criticisms, complaining, and general gossiping, and unfortunately I occasionally had to share a cabin or a dinner table with them. It was such a shame in an atmosphere that was otherwise quite accepting and friendly (we had Israelis training with Lebanese and Jordanians, and goodwill prevailed -- ponder that if you will!). A few people shirked their share of the load, including a couple of women who apparently were supposed to help us with serving one morning but instead slacked off and left us short-handed (I was doing my "serving tables" shift that day and didn't appreciate the extra work so much, and am restraining myself from emailing their sensei about it, since I know who they train with and he would NOT be pleased), but mostly people cheerfully dispensed their responsibilities and supported each other and helped each other to grow. Most people were so friendly that it just made the whiners stand out all the more.

Am I glad I went? Oh yes. Very much so. Even though I was tired before I left, and had some spirit troubles. Even though I was sick the first couple of days, and have a sore knee and sore feet and sore muscles from training my butt end off. Whether you subscribe to the "mystique" and the "mindless devotion" (the words of others, not my own, and remind me to blog about that later -- teaser for that entry will be "should Shotokan even have a 'mystique' or is that just pretentious and silly?") or not, Master Camp is a great way to demonstrate just exactly why these men are deemed "masters" of their art. They're damn good, that's why. Those who mock that should have the chance to train with them, that's all I can say. They've dedicated decades of their lives to this pursuit, and believe me, it shows. Personally, I think everyone who aspires to high ranks in our organization ought to attend this camp. It's a real eye-opener, in many good, and some not so good, ways. All of them are very valuable.

Am I glad to be home? Immeasurably. I am in my own home, I will sleep in my own bed, I've got my animals for company and I've missed them. I have taken a hot shower and put on clean dry clothes and don't have to worry that someone will wake me at 6:00AM with a whistle blowing! (okay, so I do have training tomorrow morning at 8:30AM, it's a far cry from the past week!) I will not be training in humidity that saps my strength and my will. The plane landed in Colorado in a rainstorm. Even though there was water falling from the sky, I was drier and more comfortable than I'd been in a week!

Master Camp. There were times I could not wait for it to be over. There were times when I did not want to go home so soon. It completely removed me from my normal reality, both from "real life" and from karate. It's over now, truly over, in one sense.

In another sense, I think this will stick with me for a long time. I certainly hope so. I think there is much worth holding onto.

Of Brides and Bruises

I haven't posted in quite a while. I have a good excuse though, I really do. I got engaged! 2 weeks later, I realize that my already-busy life is going to be a true insane asylum for the next 6 months.

No, I realize that has nothing to do with karate, but this is a personal blog dammit. Getting engaged is about as big and personal as it gets, and it's going to impact everything I do (similar to how getting deeply involved in this martial art changed my life, in fact). Expect my impending wedding to spill over into these posts in the next few months.

Let me tell you one thing: If you go into a swanky bridal boutique to try on gowns, you get some pretty strange looks when they see bruises all over your arms and legs. I'm convinced they all think I'm a domestic violence victim, but they were perfectly willing to sell me a nice dress anyhow. It covers the arms and legs so I won't have to stop training 2 weeks before the ceremony!

In other news, I took a kick to the elbow in training Monday night, and it still hurts. Big toe right into the funny bone, rest of the foot crashing into the forearm. I have a welt the size of a football and a distinct disinclination to bend the arm. Stabbing pains still shoot through it at sudden movements.

We leave this weekend for Master Camp, an experience I still look forward to with a mixture of excitement and trepidation. I know the training will be excellent and I'm excited to experience something I've never been to before. On the other hand, I'm overtired and overstressed before I even leave, and now I'm injured as well. A relatively minor injury, true, but it could use more healing time than it's going to get. I'm excited to train with the masters, and nervous that I won't perform well, or train up to my ability. I want to have good trainings, in these special circumstances.

I also have to put a deposit on the venue for the wedding stuff, get all my laundry done, get packed to go, finalize arrangements for pet care for my animals while I'm away, and deal with 2 "urgent" projects at work. This combination of tasks will take me about a week. So it's rather awkward, having only 3 days in which to accomplish them all.

Maybe you should all be grateful that I haven't posted in awhile. Believe it or not, this is the calmest and the most coherent I've been in 2 weeks.